Pagan and Poly – A Poly Family – an Interview Series

I talked to Johnny about his polyamorous family. His long term relationship was impacted early on by the birth of triplets. They are a family of six, with Ivy and Divi, and the triplets.

How long have you been involved in polyamory?
About 14 years, we had been looking for a third person for probably 3 or 4 years before we met Divi. We have been together almost ten years. It was something we felt might finish balancing our relationship.

Is your relationship legally formed?
With us it has been a matter of mutual respect  and honor. Treating the relationship as if it was a legal and binding marriage situation. You can’t do that in this society. Three people can own a home, it is hard for three people to own a car, it is even harder for three people to have a checking account with a money card for each. We have simply honored ourselves as a family, especially when it comes to the children. We have just always acted as though we have the same say, the same rights, same decision making authority. I am recorded as the father of the children.

Do you live together as a family?
We are a nuclear family. We went through the pregnancy together and are raising the kids together. We share the bills together.  Everything that the traditional nuclear family does, we do together, except there are three of us.


Were having the kids part of the motivation for polyamory?
Part of our search of finding a third was to open the possibility of having kids. It was something we had been talking about at the time the triplets came along. The triplets were spontaneously conceived, we weren’t using any fertility treatments. It is just the way things went.

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Mendota Dakota Pow Wow–Good for the Soul

Photos and Story by Susu Jeffrey

Mendota Dakota Pow Wow

Traditional dancer with fan and shawl

The Mendota Dakota Community celebrated their 11th Annual Welcome Home Traditional Pow Wow over the September 10th weekend in the field of St. Peter’s Church on the Mississippi bluff. The sound was the throbbing heartbeat drum with generators in the background, the ambiance—regalia and fry bread (1st batch ran out before 3:30 Saturday). The weather was perfect. These are 21st century Indian people; they know how to read treaties.

Pow Wows are joyous extended-family, cultural
gatherings with a lot of work and a lot of sitting

Mendota Dakota Pow Wow Eagle

To dance is to pray, to pray is to heal, to heal is to give, to give is to live, to live is to dance. "Why We Dance" by MariJo Moore

around visiting. Once a year-after-year you get to see the kids grow up, see the new babies and absorb hours outdoors with hundreds of dancing spirits.

Mendota Dakota Pow Wow

Fancy shawl, traditional dancers and a little girl in her jingle dress

(Please note: the photographs were taken with respectful permission only during the Saturday 1 PM, Grand Entry.)